


On How Not to Lose a Limb

by Stefanyeah



Series: Tooth And Claw [5]
Category: Muse
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Werewolf, Care of Magical Creatures, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-06
Updated: 2014-06-06
Packaged: 2018-02-03 15:39:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 933
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1749833
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stefanyeah/pseuds/Stefanyeah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>On How to Take Care of Your Werewolf</p>
            </blockquote>





	On How Not to Lose a Limb

**Author's Note:**

> Next Bingo Fill. Whoohoo. This time I filled that joker field thingy. I picked Care for Magical Creatures.
> 
> Also many thanks go to muse_manticore for listening to my rambles and giving a few ideas. One day, we will succeed in killing WhatsApp. :P

If your loved one turns into a ferocious beast each full moon, there are a few things to consider. Everyone who found themselves mated with a werewolf has their own set of rules and precautions. Some work well, most are in need of improvement.

So for all my fellow werewolf mates, I have sat down and written down a list of rules, precautions and methods that work best and those that won't work well on my mate. I am aware, that other werewolves might react differently and especially when I mention the art of seduction you have to take into account that any werewolf not half nymph will react quite differently.

Also, please be aware that while the werewolf might only have minimal memories of their human form, the human will remember what happened to the werewolf.

Still, I hope this little excursus might help and inspire you when dealing with that special time of the month.

**The List**

1) If you've already settled down, install a sturdy cage and lock your werewolf lover up.

I suggest you lock up your lover in the afternoon already, when he still can be reasoned with. The closer evening and night come, the more defiant he gets and will try to talk you into allowing him to roam the city.

If your werewolf is half nymph, he will also try and seduce you, which is almost impossible to resist. In that case, I suggest you read the newspaper, watch the news or distract yourself with something similar, entirely not sexual.

Leaving the room also helps for a while. But then you might not want your werewolf screaming for you for the whole neighbourhood to hear.

 

2) If they snarl at you through the bars of said cage, toss them a steak or two. No werewolf can resist a well-done steak. It'll keep them occupied for a while and you can afterwards watch them lazing about while digesting and enjoy peace for half an hour, if you're lucky even for an hour.

Also, I suggest you don’t give raw meat to your werewolf. The werewolf might gulf it down without problems, but once they're turned into your lover again, there’ll be stomach ache and your guilt will be increased by prolonged sulking.

 

3) But what if you've not settled down yet and are travelling constantly? In that case I suggest a few sturdy restrains (leather and chains work a charm) you can seduce your lover into.

This works rather well with the nymph, too. Trust me, as irresistible as they can be, they're also easily seduced by their lovers and will agree to pretty anything kinky you suggest after a few well placed kisses and strokes.

Make sure you choose a cheap, not too well-visited hostel with bunk beds. Also make sure it's almost empty, so you don't have to deal with curious neighbours. The bunk beds are needed to ensure your mate can be tied up securely to the poles.

The downside of this method is the very increased allurement you'll be subjected to by the nymph. So I suggest you wear earplugs and sit with your back to him, reading a gripping book.

Don't forget to check on your lover every now and then to make sure he is still okay or hasn't gnawed through the restraints.

 

4) Not advisable are squeaky toys. They may offer distraction to your werewolf for about an hour, but will lead to sulking as well. You might also end up being ignored for a day or two by your human lover.

 

5) Shrouding your werewolf in darkness is a bad idea. You might think it's the easiest way to not let him change, but as you surely are aware, this is potentially lethal to your mate.

A werewolf's body is attuned to the lunar cycle and a werewolf that isn't able to change during full moon will go through a night of pain.

One piece of further advice: If you ever see a full moon's lunar eclipse together, organise a moon stone and go outside for your werewolf to have the chance to change.

 

6) Don't even think about giving a bone to the werewolf. A well-done steak might give you bonus points with both werewolf and human, but a bone won't even impress the werewolf.

 

7) Werewolves are not docile. Even if they seem to follow one of your orders, patting their head and calling them _Good Boy_ won't go down well. Your hand will go down well their stomachs, though.

 

8) Another method that only brings momentary joy is the use of a water pistol for training purposes.

If you really want to use a water gun, make sure the werewolf is tied up well before and also make sure you don't step into it's vicinity for quite a few full moons to come. You might lose a limb or a head.

 

9) What I also don't suggest, is putting your werewolf on a leash and taking him for a walk. Trust me on that.

Trust. Me.

You might have heard that werewolves are dogs really, but where your common dog chases after rabbits and deer, your werewolf will chase after humans.

The mob that'll turn up at your doorstep the following morning is not a pleasant event either. 

Also, heavy sulking will ensue from such treatment.

 

So, in conclusion, there are lots of methods that are not advisable and quite frankly, there's none that will make those three nights each month easy.

Just how did I get myself caught in this?

 

\---- _Essay by Dominic J. Howard_


End file.
